Sometimes, becoming the best version of me (mom/wife/daughter/friend/neighbor/citizen/creator) feels like an insurmountable goal.

Resolving all the trauma, bettering the laundry list of attributes of myself that could use bettering, and uncovering my endless blindspots…it’s A LOT!

And more importantly to note, it is literally impossible. That best version of me is unattainable and perhaps is always meant to be because what would life be like if I ever became that person?

What I have found though is noticing and acknowledging is a very powerful practice and gets me most of the way there to that best version of me.

Noticing those links between childhood and my lacking behavior today.

Noticing the ways I succeed and the ways I fail.

Noticing that shadowy thought that popped up when my friend said something.

Yup, noticing and acknowledging gets us most of the way there. Noticing shines a light into those less illuminated moments or thoughts. And a lot of times, the light is really enough.

Above all, I have to notice and acknowledge who I am today and who I am today is the best version of me that I am going get right now. And that is simply all I can do.

You can stop searching.

The thing is, you have always known who you are.

Who you are isn’t a job title or a name or a gender or what car you drive or (and especially not) what your parents or anyone else thinks of you.

While you may not be able to verbalize it, you have always acted in truth of who you are.

Knowing who you are is not an intellectual activity, it a trusting one.