You know enough.

Sure, you don’t know everything but no one does!

You know enough to help that friend who has reached out to you.

You know enough to start the project you have been really wanting to create.

You know enough to write the first chapter of your book.

You know enough to cook that really yummy looking recipe.

You know enough to take the next step.

And along the way, you’ll gain some more know how and bravery to take the next.

And the next.

And the next.

And before you know it, you will be done and moving onto the next thing.

Breaking down a belief requires examining it from 360 degrees – with all the parts of ourselves and then reprogramming our minds. The layers are: main belief > supporting belief > disrupting statement > new affirmation.

I recently realized I carry a belief that getting promoted is not a good thing because it requires hard work. Here are various supporting beliefs why hard work repels me and how to reframe them.

Part of me does not think I can do the hard work. But I can do hard things! I have the ability to learn and take on responsibilities. 

Part of me thinks hard work means more effort. But there are plenty of people at more senior levels than me who are not spending more effort than I am already spending. 

Hard work means more time doing work. But working harder can also mean working smarter. I can absolutely do the work in an efficient way enabling me to enjoy the rest of my life. 

Getting promoted means I did something sneaky to get there or I sold my soul. While it may be true for some folks, getting promoted is a recognition of my efforts. And it is safe to be recognized. Attention can be a good thing! It is safe to receive attention. 

It has been engrained in me to stay under the radar. Only people who got in trouble received attention. Being a good girl meant silence.

Part of me also believes that I am not a good leader. But leadership comes in many varieties and being a petite Chinese woman does not take away from my ability to lead. I can define leadership in my own way.

Lastly, part of me thinks hard work means there will be more expected of me and I won’t be able to meet those expectations. But expectations are not set in stone. If they are unreasonable or unattainable, I have the ability to speak up and ask for help or to change them.

The way our beliefs work themselves into our consciousness fascinates me. There are many layers to each belief. Once I come to terms with this layer, there is the next one and then the next and the next. I think of how many times a day that I experience something that feeds into my various beliefs and supporting beliefs. I already have a lifetime of work ahead!

The key is to start slow, be curious and do it your way. Find what works for you in debunking and disrupting your thought process. You can do that hard work!

Over the last 6 months, I’ve fallen off track of my parenting intentions, my morning routine, my business goals and more but I’ll spare you.

The thing is – we all fall off track. This includes those very motivated people who seem like they are on top of everything. As humans, we don’t always keep a steady path on our true north.

I tell myself – it is all part of the journey. The deviations remind me that I am human, and being human is a what this life is all about. Falling off track also brings me new experiences that feed into whatever it is I am doing.

Sometimes, not doing the thing reminds me how it feels to not be doing it and reinvigorates me making me even more motivated.

Falling off track can also be a heads up that I need a break or that I need to re-evaluate and realign my goal.

What it does NOT mean is that I am a failure. The falling, re-aligning and getting back on track is all part of the journey. Though I may certainly feel like a failure, I truly believe that at no point in the journey are any of us actually failing.

So the next time you stop doing the thing you are trying to do, remember that the act of falling off track actually contributes to the journey – it never detracts from it.

One of the biggest reasons I write how I write is because I have journaled since 4th grade. Writing provided me an outlet to express thoughts that had nowhere else to go. So much of my emotional development occurred on the wide-ruled pages of my Mead notebook journals. I very much see this blog as glorified journaling.

The other big reason I write how I write is because, growing up, most of the people in my house didn’t speak or read English. Journaling was safe because I never feared any backlash or judgement.

Tonight, my oldest child read my blog. It was emotional to see her scrolling through and taking in the words that are often inspired by her or her siblings. They are usually slumbering 10 feet from me in our dimmed bedroom as the thoughts I have throughout the day come spilling out during the late evening hours.

Watching her read my words, I realized that I was no longer writing in private. Yes, I know I have readers (thank you!) but it is quite different when these intimate thoughts are read by those who are closest to me.

I started to wonder – will I change the way I write now that I know she may log into my site at any point?

I am proud to say the conclusion was no.

After hearing some advice on a podcast or in a book many years ago, I set an intention to only write my story on this blog – not my kids’ or my partner’s or anyone else’s. I know that each of the posts on this site are true to me. My children reading them does not change my truth.

And so today, another page is turned on this path of creating. I am so excited and a little nervous about my kids reading these words. And yet, I know this is very much part of my legacy, an extension of my parenting and an example to them to unapologetically be who they are in every space they occupy.

Trust in yourself.

Trust that you can build your dream life.

Trust that you are the best parent to your kids.

Trust that you can overcome any hurdles you encounter.

Trust that you can learn what knowledge you may be missing.

Trust that you make the best decisions you can with the knowledge and resources you have.

Trust that your best of the moment is enough.