Back in 2019, I took a business and marketing course. There was a challenge to post selfie’s on Instagram because people connect with people.

I cringed so hard.

I did not like the idea of selfie’s at all. I thought they were self-centered, superficial and fake – everything I didn’t want to be.

But being the good student I am, I started posting selfie’s as part of the assignment.

It was wildly uncomfortable. It felt scary and vulnerable. But it did not feel self-centered or superficial or fake.

I realized that I had a fear of being perceived as such but I have not received that feedback. In fact, I found it to be another great medium of self-expression, like writing.

I no longer cringe at the idea of selfie’s but embrace it as another way to explore who I am because like everything else, it is about making it your own.

I half-jokingly describe my writing as glorified journaling.

As I shared yesterday, I journaled from a young age and would address and summon “Journal,” a larger than life spirit that wholly accepts my deepest thoughts without judgement or ridicule. Journal is an entity that is almost 30 years in the making, and while I no longer start my writing with “Dear Journal,” it is still very much the spirit in how I write and my heart and mind bring them in as I put pen to paper or fingers to keyboard.

My glorified journaling is my art. That is still hard for me to say but the self expression that comes out is the equivalent of leaping expressively across stage, playing a riveting concerto or painting a breathtaking watercolor. When I go back to re-read my writing, I am often surprised by what words have come together and made their way onto paper. I even question if it was my writing at all, like in this piece.

In wondering how my words come to life, I realize it is almost as if that Journal/God/Spirit has held that space for me. It is only through the relationship that I am able to write, and the interplay of my entering that space allows my words to flow and for that spirit to speak through me.

So who is the creator? Me or Spirit? Is there anyway to really differentiate between my and their contribution? And ultimately, does it really matter?