Lisa for Real

2.72 My secret musical tool

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It’s beautiful how music can bring us right back to a moment or a state of mind. There might be a word for that kind of person – where sounds bring us back to a moment – though I have no idea the word.

In any case, I have quite a few moments that stick for me.

“A Wonderful World” gives me a lump in my throat because my friend danced with her dad at her wedding to it, and every time I hear it, I feel the sadness in missing my own dad at that moment. At the same time, I feel immense love and gratitude for my dad. It is definitely bittersweet.

The Cranberries’ “Zombie” brings me back to the countless nights that my friends and I danced while a band played it at a bar in Hong Kong. It gets layered with memories from the 90’s of my cousins and I listening to The Cranberries album.

David Gray’s album A New Day at Midnight reminds me of the first winter that my husband and I dated and the energy of our young love. While I enjoy listening to it throughout the year, there is something special about coupling it with the winter season.

Over the last year, I have blogged daily. It hasn’t always gone smoothly. I have had moments of doubt, wondering if what I was writing was worthy of attention. I have had other moments where I didn’t know what to write. And other moments where life seems too hectic and full to squeeze in a blog post.

One evening, shortly after I started my daily blogs, I went to find a song on the Insight Timer app that might spur my creativity. I searched “creativity” and found a track called “Creativity Flow State Music” by Marita Espada. I started listening to it every night while writing. At first, it was a nice to have – something that distracted me from the alerts on my phone or the sounds of the baseboard heating or the wind outside.

As I continued to listen to it dozens and dozens of times over the year, it became what I use to get me in the zone. The music tugs at the corners of my heart and brain, uniting them to bring thoughts and memories onto the screen. It has been one of my tools in making daily blogging actually happen.

I don’t use the track for anything else. Not for meditation. Not for completing a work assignment. Not for any of my other projects. That track, which I’m listening to now as I write, is dedicated to this one task.

Music has a magic that connects with the different parts of us. I love that I have found a way to bring music into my life to bring about my creativity.

2.3 The second time around

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I have always had what I would describe as some version of beginner’s luck. Not in everything, but in enough things to notice a trend.

The first time I do something, it is really good! But then when I do things the second time around, the results aren’t quite like the first.

This happens constantly with cooking or baking, playing games, creating, and so on.

As I am embarking on this second year of daily blogging, I’m naturally concerned that I’m going to fail – either I’ll get bored and stop or my writing will somehow take a nosedive.

I have to remind myself, just because it feels like “been there done that” doesn’t mean it’s actually true. Things happen a second, third, tenth, hundredth time all the time. Every Monday is the start of a week, and I’m not over here giving up because I’m clocking in yet another week of my life.

Time is a constant – there is no stopping it. What if I were to approach my daily blogging that way? Seth Godin says he blogs everyday because it is a new day. That is definitely a great way to see it.

356. Glorified journaling

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I have shared on more than one occasion that I see my writing as glorified journaling.

My journaling started with a blue, wide-ruled Mead notebook back in fourth grade. Throughout my youth and teenage years, my journal was my confidante, and I shared my most pressing problems and important thoughts. When I read those thoughts now, they seem trivial and immature. That is because I have grown. But those feelings were an important part of my growth.

The glory in writing lies as much in the future reading of it as much as in the experience of writing it. My journals are time capsules to emotions and memories that are long gone.

Reading that writing allows me to bear witness to me again. In the writing process, I feel seen and heard even though no one is there beside me. Reading it much later on shows me where I’ve been and how growth is very much part of the journey.

349. What’s all the hype about poetry?

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When I was younger, I never got poetry.

I was taught iambic pentameter, the sequence of haikus, and other techniques used in poems but I don’t think I was ever taught or told the essence of what poetry is.

It has only been this past year when I have come to realize poetry deliberately offers space. Space for thought, wonder and slowing down.

At least that is what poetry is giving to me at this moment. I have a feeling what it offers differs by person and situation.

All of that fluffy language gives a place for my weary head and legs to rest.

Those confusing similes and metaphors make me go slower so I can actually understand and absorb what is being said.

That strange s p a c i n g of words and verse gives me permission to spread myself out a little bit too.

I was never taught this about poetry but is this something teachable? Or is it part of the journey in slowing, growing and knowing?

337. Create create create

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“Who am I?” Is a loaded question. And there are a whole lot of ways of answering it. Personally, I think answering it with a list of roles and titles is insufficient.

My answer was found through creating and reflecting and creating some more. When I say creating, I mean bringing our thoughts and feelings to life whether that be through writing, dancing, community organization or your chosen medium.

When we bring our thoughts to life, we have a tangible representation of who are. And so we create and then do it again. The more creations we put out there, the more examples there are to pull from when answering “Who am I?”