The saga of my new computer continued today. The lag time was unbearable and even the IT department was befuddled. They found it was running at 100% CPU for no reason.

My understanding is that CPU is the capacity of the computer. So it was running at max capacity. Everything I tried to do from opening a file to moving the cursor into a new cell took minutes to process.

Funny enough, I feel like in these first weeks of June, I am running at max capacity. Where I’ve hit my limit with the combination of emotional, physical and mental responsibilities and labor. For my computer, I think it’s a little more simple – how many programs are running and was the computer built to handle that much.

Though, are we that different? Humans were never meant to handle this much by ourselves. Motherhood is certainly a great example of that. Mothering was never meant to be a single person job. Almost all mothers are running at 100% CPU if not more. And I also think about how the world’s problems are accessible at our fingertips. We were built to handle immediate dangers – not necessarily the suffering of millions of people across the world. (This is not to say that we should or shouldn’t.)

So as so many of us are running around at max capacity, remember to take that time to close out the programs you no longer need, finish up the deliverables that are hanging over your head, delegate and reboot when needed.


I write everyday because it allows me to voice what is at the surface. Once that is out of my head, I can dig in another layer deeper. My daily writing practice has been my greatest exploration of self and humanity. Sign up here to receive these thought nuggets in your inbox on the daily.