Lisa for Real

290. Hitting ‘publish’

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On the eve of launching my podcast, I am anxious and questioning myself.

I’ve been curled up in fetal position, nestled in a Lisa-shaped dip in the bed, warm, cozy and comfy under the covers. And launching this podcast would be the equivalent of throwing off the covers, shocking my body with frigid air and maybe also having a bucket of ice water poured on me simultaneously.

And for what? Why would I willingly embark on such an endeavor?

Why not just stick with writing? It’s worked out okay for me so far!

Podcasting seems like a whole other level of baring my soul. I’ve recorded hours of audio that I’ve deleted upon playback. Hearing my voice makes me cringe and gives me a pit in my stomach.

Stretching myself and my creating seems harder this time than before. But part of me also wonders if it is actually any different from when I launched this blog which I was equally inspired to create.

I have wanted to create a podcast for longer than I’ve been a mother. I have an archived folder on my computer with multiple cover arts for podcast ideas that have come and gone. If I don’t stretch and reach now, how long before this dream leaves me entirely, tired of my hiding and fears?

Fears are thoughts that our brains have created to protect us, but not the adult version of us. They were created to protect the little child version of us. Adult version of me knows podcasting is the next thing – even if the reasons are unclear. Little version of me says it is downright terrifying and in inquiring a little further, it is scary because new stages of my life have felt unsupported and are always where I lose friends – that feels scary and unsafe.

Oh, little Lisa, you have survived every new thing that you’ve done. New stages are where you’ve met amazing people – people who remain friends today. Following your inspirations have always led you down a path that seems like it was meant to be. And you have so much support from your physical and spiritual team who have been part of the magic of living this inspired life.

Intellectually knowing why I feel the fear does not make it any easier. This is one of those moments where I am feeling the fear and doing it anyway. Closing my eyes and hitting ‘publish’.

And I know, there will not be any big explosion. There will not be a mass exodus of family and friends. There will not be an upheaval of my life. There will be no covers pulled off of me. And there will be no bucket of ice water poured on me.

But what a choice to hit ‘publish’.

289. Follow the breadcrumbs to inspiration

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Inspiration is available to us in the everyday, and it can come from almost anything and everything, if we allow it.

Inspiration is commonly seen as something that happens to us. It comes from “out there” by an intangible source and just hits us, like a bolt of lightning. That is the glossy, magazine cover-worthy version of inspiration, and I love when that happens.

However, inspiration can also be sought. No one wants to hear that with a little legwork you, too, can be inspired. But it’s true. Being inspired does not have to be a passive practice. It can be a choice and a result of following our curiosities.

What are you curious about? Or what do you find to be curious? What peaks your interest?

To me, I am most curious about people. Inspiring people are not just those who have done something noteworthy like write a book, break a world record or make a scientific discovery.

To me, everyone is interesting and inspiring! Everyone has creativity to be expressed, stories to tell and a beauty within and a significance in this lifetime.

In the pursuit of an inspired life, don’t wait for inspiration and don’t discount what is right in front of you. Follow the breadcrumbs it is leaving you all the time. If you’re looking for them, they will appear.

288. The Trojan horse to community building

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In a recent podcast interview, my guest, Jean, and I talked about art and community. She said that art is “uniquely qualified to tell stories,” and the shared experience of watching/hearing/feeling/seeing art of all kinds is unifying versus divisive.

When she said that, I saw art as the Trojan horse in building community. It elevates us above our differences and offers an opportunity to connect on a whole different level. To appreciate a jazz quartet’s playing or a contemporary dance performance or a fine meal with beautiful plating, your heart has to be open. And when your heart is open, you can’t hate or be angry. When your heart is open, it is open not just for the art but also for other people.

How many times (pre-pandemic) have we comment to a stranger after a show or at the exhibit of what we had just experienced?

Community comes from connection. Connection can be facilitated by a shared heart-opening experience. That experience can come from art.

287. Claiming what I want

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I have always had a hard time deciding and claiming what I want. This ranges from “little” things like what donut to choose at the donut shop to “big” things like a salary range I’d like my job to have.

I didn’t have role models growing up who staked a claim for what they wanted. They were all immigrants who were getting by with what they had. Survival was the goal and their children (my generation) was the focus. Because (of those very good reasons) I didn’t have that exposure, and I never got to learn and practice how to declare what I want.

This is not a defect. This is a tremendous growth opportunity for me. The foundational reasons why I can’t decide and claim what I desire can be unlearned, and then I can learn how to by finding others who can model it for me and practicing.

286. Out of our hands

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Sometimes our best laid plans are just that – plans.

Some plans never come to fruition. Or they come but in their own time.

Our ego will gladly “own” those plans and call it “ours.” If they work out, our ego will fill our brains with self-congratulatory thoughts. And if they don’t work out, they will be happy to blame and shame us.

But do we deserve either?

Maybe we are only the vessel or channel or messenger of those plans. Whether they materialize may not be in our hands at all.